2025 Year Compass: From Deep Sadness to Destiny

Looking back at my calendar for 2025, I see such a paradox.

On paper, I was supposed to be the full time MBA student—networking, securing internships, obsessing over my future. But in reality, I did more Bible study than MBA study this year. I spent more time breaking generational curses than I did reading recent academic journal articles. 

By the world’s logic, I should have failed and be left behind.

Instead, I won 1st Prize in the school’s Case Crackathon. I completed my MBA in a year, finished Cru Ministry's The Significant Woman program, and consistently posted on Medium. I even finished all my driving theory tests (BTT and FTT). I healed from that deep, suffocating sadness. And most importantly, I brought my family to Christ in repentance—watching my parents started attending church with me.

As I sit here filling out my Year Compass, I realize this year wasn't just a blur of events. It was living proof of Ephesians 6:12—a verse that was also spoken to me as a word of knowledge by God through His anointed prophets about exactly what I was facing.

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

 I finally understand that all my struggles—even the career ones, the financial ones, even the health ones, and the relational ones—were never physical battles. They were spiritual.

Spiritual alignment is the ONLY productivity hack that finally worked for me.

I spent so long trying to recover from the physical and emotional "poison" I was forced to endure. I sought help everywhere—counseling, neurofeedback, supplements, you name it. It hurts to remember the critiques from those "esteemed" Christians who lacked the compassion and discernment to see what I was really fighting. They looked at the surface and judged, not spiritually sensitive enough to realise the spiritual root cause.

But I didn't make it through because I hustled harder or fought better on my own.

I made it because new Kingdom friends that God led me to recently fervently prayed for me when I was too weak to pray for myself. I made it because of the deep revelations I finally got to learn, grasp, and process through during those biblical foundation classes. But here is the key: I only gained those revelations when I surrendered my intellect to God. I had to stop trying to analyze everything with my mind and let my spirit receive the truth. I realized that spiritual truths can only be perceived by our hearts in the spirit, and never by our will using more head knowledge to try and analyze God's ways. We would never discover the true treasure hidden in the Bible if we read it without the Holy Spirit.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” — Isaiah 55:8-9 NIV

The turning point wasn't a job offer arriving during one of my deepest seasons of heartache; it was begging my dad to come to church with me after Grandpa passed. It was that moment during the house blessing when he finally surrendered that Thai god pendant he’d held onto for decades, and my mum surrendered her Catholic items she had clung to, before both my parents said the sinner's prayer together. I can still feel the shift in the atmosphere. The heaviness broke. I encountered the Holy Spirit, I received the gift of tongues, and my spiritual eyes finally opened for the first time in my life. God started revealing my prophetic destiny in bits and pieces through His anointed pastors He newly placed in my life, and suddenly, everything changed with renewed hope.

My mind cleared. The ability to multitask came back. The joy came back (thank God for Running Man and the laughter it brought me). I didn't win that Case Crackathon because I was the smartest I won because I was operating under a new spiritual mandate.

I also need to stop apologizing for who I am.

For so long, I felt guilty about my "chameleon-like" nature. I thought my adaptability and free-spiritedness were weaknesses—signs that I was unstable or didn't fit the mold. But looking at this year, I see truth: my ever-changing nature, my deep curiosity, my flexibility—these are Kingdom assets. God wired me this way. I am not unstable; I am crazily bold and strategically versatile—but I realize now that this power is only effective when it is ruled by the Spirit and not the flesh, as the flesh is naturally bound to the cycle of forced repetition.

I’m learning to be okay with transient relationships. Not everyone is meant to stay, and that’s okay. Earthly connections are ruled by divine relational destiny—like Naomi and Ruth in the Bible—not by my own striving to maintain superficial obligations to engage.

So, here I am at the end of 2025.

I’m done asking "Why is this happening?" Now, I ask "Who is fighting this battle?"

2025 was the year I woke up. 2026 is the year I suit up. As long as I fought with my physical eyes—looking at the bank account, the critics, and the uncompassionate voices from people with no spiritual understanding about the rulers of this world and the spiritual realm that affects the physical realm—I lost. The moment I opened my spiritual eyes, I won. I won because Christ had already won the spiritual battle when He surrendered His blood on the cross and resurrected for the promise in Joshua 1:5.

I am burning the ships. No safety nets. Just trust. I am letting God be God in all areas.